Never Been Kissed
by Catherine E. Grant
Summary: Life holds a rocky road indeed for Remus Lupin and Minerva McGonagall, while Severus Snape shows his (slimy) colours and several students take that first romantic step.
1. Never Been Kissed: Chapter One

### NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 1.

Author: Catherine E. Grant

**__**

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So, Professor Lupin," Lavender asked slyly, "What was your first kiss like? Where were you, who was it with and why do you remember it?"

He grinned. "I don't think I should answer that."

"Oh, come on Professor," Hermione begged. "Everyone else has."

"Nearly," Ginny muttered darkly.

Harry blushed.

"Very well." Lupin sighed. "It was two o'clock in the morning, with my transfigurations teacher. The kiss was fantastic."

Everyone stared in astonishment. Hermione found her voice first. "And, ah, what happened because of it?"

"We fell out of the tree."

"You were up a tree?/With your transfigurations teacher?" Fred and George were beside themselves. Of course, to anyone who didn't know the two and know they were identical twins, that could be taken literally.

Remus nodded slowly, thinking. Ron was laughing and Ginny was giving Harry supposedly covert, interested looks. He leaned away from her. "How do you kiss up a tree?"

"Very, very carefully, I'm sure" came the dry reply, but it wasn't Lupin who had spoken. All eyes turned to the doorway, where Professor McGonagall stood, hugging a large book. She stepped into the room and put it down on a table.

"I just came by to drop this off, Miss Granger, in case you wanted to get an early start on your reading. It seems, however, that you've found some more interesting entertainment."

Hermione stared at her, mouth open in a fair impression of a fish. McGonagall rolled her eyes. "Really, Miss Granger, you ought to know better than to believe such silly nonsense. Remus, you ought to know better than to spread such rumours." She took her glasses off and rubbed her eyes.

Lupin shrugged and couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face.

"Well, you can't blame me for trying, Min."

"Can't I?" Her voice was cold. "And don't call me Min, you know that I detest it."

McGonagall went to put her glasses back on but he took them out of her hand. "Leave them, Minerva. You look beautiful without them."

"Flatterer."

"It's true."

"Yeah, right."

"You are beautiful. What do I have to do to make you believe me?" He took her hand and raised it to his lips. "Minerva McGonagall, I am completely and totally enamoured of you. Whenever I shut my eyes I think of you. When I'm talking to someone I strain to hear your voice in the background. I'm always thinking of you."

McGonagall burst out laughing and Remus looked rather sheepish. She claimed her hand back. "Just for that, I'll send you a lovely little _silver_ token of my affection next full moon. You should know better than to encourage this student nonsense with fabrications of your own. The day I kiss you, Remus Lupin, will be the day I get run over by the Hogwarts express, thrown off Gryffindor tower, eaten by the giant squid and proposed to by Snape. As I said, not likely to happen any time soon. Good day. Fifth years remember that your assignment is due tomorrow. Mr Longbottom, if you're looking for your toad it's under the couch, about to be eaten by Miss Granger's cat." 

Both Neville and Hermione dropped to the floor to recover their pets. By the time they got back on their feet, Professor McGonagall had swept out and Professor Lupin was flipping through the book she had left.

"No wonder it's in the restricted section," he muttered. "You shouldn't really be reading this, Hermione. That said, you'll probably find it very interesting. Lavender, I apologise for the little story I made up. Actually, my first kiss was with my sister's best friend, in the summer holidays of my third year. Her brother dared us. She kissed me and then ran off to wash out her mouth. Not overly romantic, but then, it _was_ my third year, you remember. Now, you all ought to get some sleep. Goodnight."

Lupin raised a hand to the students and left the room.

There was silence for a moment or too. Finally Lavender spoke. "I feel so gullible," she sighed. Hermione nodded. She didn't usually agree with the other girls of her year but for once she did.

"I think we all feel stupid," Seamus said.

"Up a tree? There's no way we believed that," George scoffed. 

Fred laughed. "Nup, no way. Didn't have us going for a moment."

"Yeah, right." Ginny rolled her eyes. "Harry, why don't you tell us about your first kiss?"

Harry muttered something under his breath. Ginny leaned closer. "What was that? I didn't quite hear."

"IsaidIveneverbeenkissed" he spluttered hurriedly. "Sorry?" asked Ginny innocently.

"I. Said. I've. Neverbeenkissed." Harry mumbled, only slightly more intelligently. The girl leaned away, and nodded. "That's okay, Harry, we can learn together!" she said brightly. "Why don't we practice?"

The twins howled with laughter as Harry looked desperately towards the door. As if by accident, Hermione and Ron were sitting on the floor right in front of it, setting up a chessboard.

"Now, Harry, come closer, yep, that's right, NO! Closer to me, not Neville! Neville, will you stop laughing and help me catch him? HARRY! Come back here!"

The voices filtered through the wall as Remus Lupin leaned heavily against the other side of the doorframe. The fat lady looked at him in concern.

"Are you sure you're all right, dear?" she asked. "You don't look too well."

Remus shook his head. "No, thanks, I'm fine." He listened to the racket inside the common room and decided Ginny must have made a capture as it suddenly dimmed. In the loud cheering that followed the thirty seconds or so of silence he was sure he heard the twins, Ron, Hermione, Neville, Seamus, Lavender and just about everyone else in the room except the focus of the attention: Harry and Ginny.

He grinned to himself, but the smile faded into nothing.

He'd made the story up, that was obvious enough, but he couldn't very well go out and admit that his little 'declaration of love' had been an honest one. Minerva would laugh at him. The events of tonight would spread quickly through the school and add to his 'joking' reputation. He doubted any of the students would think very deeply about anything he'd said, once it was apparent he'd been lying through his teeth about the kiss. Ginny, maybe, and Hermione, they were sharper than they looked, but that would be about all.

What an idiot. Remus rested his hand against his forehead where a headache was beginning to form.

"What a dolt," he muttered.

The fat lady blinked in concern. "Are you sure you're alright, dearie?" she repeated, hovering worriedly at his shoulder. He nodded. "You ought to go see Madame Pomfrey, she'll have something if you've got a headache."

"I'll do that," Remus told her, not really paying much attention. She'd always tried to mother him ever since he'd been a student staggering in tired and wan after a particularly bad transformation.

"She'll never take me seriously now," he muttered, and the portrait didn't reply. "Anything I say she'll just take as a joke. She's older than me anyway so I doubt she'd ever even consider me in that light, but I had to try, didn't I? Had to go and make a stupid effort and put my big fat foot in it."

He pushed away from the wall and strode quickly down the corridor. He couldn't stay here, not where one of the students could find him and start making inferences.

There were some nights when the Shrieking Shack still looked pretty good.

The Fat Lady was thoughtful as she watched him go. She wanted to follow, but was too respectful of his privacy and mindful of her duty to seriously consider it. His footfalls faded in the distance and a large painted tear rolled down her cheek.


	2. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Two

****

NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 2

CATHERINE E. GRANT  
  
**_ Author's note:_** For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

I don't know Professor Sinistra's first name, and couldn't find it after a **very** cursory reading of the books, so I'm going with Simona. I have a friend named Simona (Simi), but if she ever reads this I'll eat the Sorting Hat. 

And yes, the **Never Been Kissed**_ does apply to Minerva as well as Harry. _

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remus Lupin walked into the Great Hall, feeling bad. Most of the students and all of the teachers were already there. He purposely chose a seat at the far end of the teacher's table, on the right of Professor Sinistra. The red head raised an eyebrow at his sudden company but didn't say anything. Normally he would sit near the head of the table, with Professors Dumbledore, Hagrid and McGonagall, where the four of them got into some of the strangest arguments she'd ever heard. 

"Toast, Remus?" He looked up distractedly to see Professor Sinistra giving him a bemused smile. She waved the platter in his face and he blinked. "You just buttered a dinner plate," she explained gently.

Remus looked down and flushed guiltily. "Um, yeah," he agreed. Sinistra said: "Would you like some toast then, Remus?" 

"S'pose so." He took a piece and sloshed it around in the butter on the plate. 

"What's wrong?"  
"Why do you automatically assume that something's wrong, Simona? I'm fine, wonderful, feeling just great."

"If that's the case, then I'm a hippogriff," Simona Sinistra replied sarcastically. 

He imagined her with feathers.

"Now, Remus, are you going to tell me the truth?"   
He sighed. "What's your fascination with the truth? Does it really matter?"  
"If you don't want to tell me…"  
"I don't."  
"You might feel better if you talk to someone."  
"About what? Simona, I said there's nothing to talk about."  
"Remus… You said you didn't want to tell me. That implies that there is something that you _could_ tell me." 

Sinistra flashed him a triumphant smile. Cheerily she took another large helping of strawberry jam and dumped it on her pancake, smearing it around before adding a dollop of thick, chocolate cream. 

"That's disgusting, Simi, strawberry jam and chocolate… it's too early. Won't your stomach reject it?"

  
"Nope." She took a quick bite and licked her lips in exaggerated ecstasy. "Of course," she went on conversationally, "if you normally sat down here you'd know that. But you don't, you always sit up there with them-" she jerked her head in Dumbledore's direction, "-so you don't. Today you're not sitting with them so I surmised that there had to be something wrong. And the way you're acting just confirms it. 

"Now, Remus, I don't mean to pry, but I can tell there's something wrong and I hoping it's nothing too big or anything that'll affect your teaching. Is it something to do with, you know, that time of the month?" 

Simona broke off and paused to fit the rest of the pancake into her mouth. Remus turned away. The desire to let her think it was being a werewolf that was bothering him was too strong to ignore. It would be the easy way out. 

He only wished that being a werewolf _were _the problem. 

When he turned back to her, a bright, fake smile was plastered on his face and he was shaking his head in mock surprise. 

"Don't know how you see through me, Simona. I haven't been feeling too great lately, and well, you know, I don't think I can trust Severus to make me the Wolfsbane potion. We don't exactly get along." That at least was the truth. 

He looked down at his plate. "You know, Simi, suddenly I don't feel too hungry any more. Guess I'll just go and prepare for my classes, see you round." Remus inclined his head as he got up and pushed his chair in. Sinistra nodded a little in response.

In the seat beside Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall listened with only half an ear to what the Headmaster was saying. It bothered her, she didn't want to admit, what she had caught Remus saying the previous night. Oh, he'd made such a fine show of saying he was joking, but there had been a flash of something – was it hurt? – when she'd laughed, that didn't seem to fit in. And she'd been so glib, dismissing it all. Of course, he'd made it up and she was glad he'd taken it back, because she didn't want any rumours about herself flying around the school, but that didn't mean she had to be happy about the rest of it.

She wasn't looking forward to facing him today. When Remus finally walked in, Minerva turned all her attention to her cereal and pretended to be listening to the conversation. It was a surprise and a relief, but also a little disappointing, that he chose to sit with Sinistra, Pomfrey and Filch. She didn't have to talk with him – big plus – but she liked sitting near him. She noted with satisfaction that he didn't seem too comfortable where he was sitting; Poppy Pomfrey and Argus Filch ignored him but that Sinistra woman seemed determined to quiz him about something. 'Serves him right.' Minerva had never really like the Astronomy Professor because the latter had a tendency to stick her nose in where in didn't belong. And right now where it didn't belong was anywhere near Remus.

McGonagall shook her head slightly. Was she feeling territorial? Oh, yeah, that'd be great. Her, Minerva McGonagall, feeling territorial about _Remus Lupin_! She could imagine the rapturous, gleeful expression on Rita Skeeter's face if she could put _that_ in the Daily Prophet. He used to be her student, for God's sake! 

Could she be getting soft for him, now, after all these years? He'd been in his seventh year when she was in her first year of teaching; there was an age difference of five years. Remus Lupin had always been her friend, even then, one of the only good friends she had. She didn't want anything to spoil that friendship, but it looked like something already had.

  
Something called Minerva McGonagall.

'Why did I have to be so stupid?' Silently Minerva remonstrated with herself. Why had she let her mouth run away with her? She'd always been touchy, but to have bitten so quickly… No wonder Remus had looked hurt. The way she'd laughed at him…made fun of his sweet comments… She'd even told him not to call her Min. 

She didn't hate it, not really. She didn't like it from most people, but Remus, well, Remus was different. He'd never been condescending to her, or acted like she amused him, like Dumbledore sometimes did; he always took her seriously and acted like a friend. He never dismissed anything she said, he had a wonderful sense of humour and a reputation that she'd do nearly anything for. Oh, she knew how everyone thought of them. Remus was well loved by so many students, even though he was a werewolf, because he was always so genuinely nice. He always had a smile and moment for everyone. Whereas she… Minerva had no illusions as to how most people thought of her. Strict, cold, defensive and harsh. The best anyone could say of her was that she was fair. 

Minerva always tried to be fair. 

Why couldn't she be more like Remus? She bit her lip. The truth was that she was scared. Scared of letting anyone in, of being totally open, scared of being hurt. Minerva had been so lonely for so long that shutting everyone out had become second nature. There were still days, however, when she wondered if it could have been different, and prayed that it had been. Minerva McGonagall didn't really like the person she had become, but what choice had she had? What choice did she have now?

And why did she feel so terrible? A part of her supposed she was feeling guilty. She didn't want to admit it, but perhaps she was. She shouldn't have snapped at Remus. She shouldn't have just dismissed him like that, as though he were still one of her students. She'd never even treated him like that when he _was _a student. 

Minerva wondered if she should feel annoyed about the little story he'd been telling the students. Maybe. Then again, she could see the humour in that. Someone, probably Parvati, had asked a silly question, and he'd given a silly answer. They'd jump at it and then he'd laugh and admit he'd made it up, and then they'd laugh, and it would all be alright. If she hadn't walked into the room at that point…if she'd just waited five minutes…if she'd been five minutes earlier so he never said anything…nothing would have happened. 

Nothing had happened. Why then did she feel so guilty?   
  
She snuck a quick glance along the table. Severus Snape met her eyes and she shuddered involuntarily before looking away. There was something predatory in his gaze, almost territorial, that gave her an uneasy feeling about the man. She didn't want to look again, because Snape would think she was watching him, but she'd managed to see what she wanted anyway.

Remus was gone. Minerva winced. Maybe he'd left because he thought she was going to try and talk to him, tell him that she was annoyed with him or something. 

Ridiculous. Why would he do that? It wasn't like he thought of her in any capacity other than professional. He was probably just embarrassed after last night. Not that he had any real reason to be embarrassed. She was the one who'd made a fool out of herself, and she was the one still making a fool of herself right now. 

Idly she played with her bowl. The crisp, appealing flakes had become a tepid, soggy mess. "Yuck," she said aloud to no one in particular. Abruptly she stood up. "I'm not hungry any more," she announced. 

Albus Dumbledore and Rubeus Hagrid looked up at her in surprise. Dumbledore was on his third pancake and Hagrid his seventh slice of toast. 

"Yer sure, Minnie? Yer haven't eaten a bite," Hagrid protested. The giant man looked ferocious but was in actuality one of the sweetest people Minerva knew. He was one of the rare few she allowed to shorten her name, if only because he'd do it no matter what she said. It was impossible to argue with Hagrid on such matters. The gentle giant would listen politely and calmly pay no attention whatsoever. She forced herself to smile. "Yes, Rubeus, I only have a small appetite."  
  
"Minerva? You don't seem yourself today," Dumbledore probed gently. She sighed, not really wanting to fend off his questions. "I'm not, Albus," she admitted quietly. "Maybe I'll go get a potion from Poppy later. I'm not sleeping too well these days." 

He appeared to accept her comment at face value. Knowing Dumbledore, Minerva could only hope that he had really accepted it and wasn't just humouring her. 

She pushed in her chair and walked slowly from the hall. 


	3. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Three

****

NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 3.

Author: Catherine E. Grant

**__**

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

I don't know Professor Sinistra's first name, and couldn't find it after a **very** cursory reading of the books, so I'm going with Simona. I have a friend named Simona (Simi), but if she ever reads this I'll eat the Sorting Hat. 

And yes, the **Never Been Kissed**_ does apply to Minerva as well as Harry. _

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Minerva began to shake just as soon as she got into the corridor. Hoping no one saw her, she slumped helplessly against the wall. She sniffed, audibly, and dabbed at her eyes with a white cotton handkerchief. It smudged the little mascara she was wearing and she cursed her decision to start wearing make-up again. Just what had started that, anyway? Remus. The answer was always Remus. 

"Professor McGonagall? Is everything okay?" 

The speaker was Hermione Granger, one of her sixth year students. Of all her current students, Hermione was the one Minerva felt closest to. If she ever had a daughter, she'd be ecstatic if she were anything like Hermione.

Hermione was sensitive enough not to press the issue when Minerva didn't reply straight away. The look of concern on her face was genuine.

"I'm alright, Hermione." Minerva managed a weak smile and wondered if it was as watery as it seemed. "Really." She sniffed again and tucked the handkerchief back into the left sleeve of her robe. 

"Oh," the girl replied. She shifted nervously from foot to foot. Her next words were rushed. "Well, Professor, you see there's something really important I wanted to see you about, but it can wait if you don't want to talk now, it's just that I really need to see you and-"

"We can talk in my office." 'Heavens forbid!' thought Minerva. The last thing she needed was it to get round the school that she was incapacitated and had been caught crying in the corridors by a student!

"What did you want to see me about, Miss Granger?" 

They stopped in front of a decorated piece of wooden panelling; she spoke the password and the panel swung aside to reveal her office. It was neat, clean and seemingly devoid of personal items except for the many books stacked in alphabetical order on the shelves. Even those were mostly school-related texts, Minerva had to admit. So little of her personality was stamped on the room that it might as well have belonged to someone else entirely. 

Hermione said, "Well, uh, it's kind of silly actually." Minerva smiled ruefully. She knew what _that _feeling was like! "I'll decide that," she told her kindly, relieved that no more damning tears were on her face. If her eyes were a little watery, what of it? For all anyone knew she'd tried to wear contacts and they hadn't agreed with her.

"Um, you see, well… I'm sorry, Professor. It seems too foolish now, I can't bother you with this…" the girl shook her head and made for the door. 

"Don't be silly, Hermione." Minerva placed a gentle hand on her shoulder and tried to look convincing. She wasn't sure how much of a success she looked. Undoubtably her neat bun was messed from slumping against the door, her eyes red and her face marked with tearstains. She didn't look like someone _anyone _could go to for advice, let alone someone like Hermione. "Don't be silly," she repeated. "If it was worthwhile to approach me with in the first place, then it's worthwhile telling me about now. I won't laugh."  
  
'No,' she thought, 'I've done too much of _that_ recently.'

The girl took a deep breath, shuddered, breathed in again. She raised teary eyes to her teachers. "I just wanted to ask you for some advice. I think you're probably my best female friend here, because I haven't really made any good friends except Harry and Ron. And well, I can't exactly talk to _them_ about this!"

"In that case, sit down and tell me what's on your mind," Minerva invited. Maybe she could listen without alienating _this_ friend as well.

Hermione perched on the soft couch, the only sign of extravagance in the bleak room. Minerva sank down beside her. 

She took a calming breath, and dug her fingers deep into her palms. Her heart was pounding miserably and her eyes were burning. She felt like a damn fool, and just sitting there proved it. Finally, she whispered "What do you do when you think you've lost the dearest friend you have?"

"That's a darned good question," Hermione replied, and gave her teacher a closer look. McGonagall appeared to have been put through the wringer. She immediately felt guilty for wanting to bother her with her thoughts about Ron. She could decide if she liked him without any input from Minerva McGonagall.

"Looks like you need to talk more than I do, Professor," Hermione said quietly. The woman flinched guiltily. Her eyes were definitely red now. When she'd first seen her, Hermione thought the extra colour on the woman's face was a trick of the light, but she was certain now it wasn't. 

"Well?"  
"Well nothing." Minerva gave a shaky laugh. "I'm a mess, aren't I?"  
Hermione nodded silently. She reached across and proffered McGonagall the box of tissues from her desk. She accepted them with a nod of thanks. 

What could she tell her? She was sitting here all sympathetic now, but if she told her, by tonight it could be all around the school. 'No,' she chastised herself, 'Hermione's not like that, she wouldn't do that.'

Hermione seemed to read her thoughts. Quietly she said, "I promise I won't tell anyone, not even Ron, Harry or Professor Dumbledore, if you want to tell me anything."

Minerva nodded. Maybe it was time to get it off her chest. It was silly, keeping everything so deep inside and getting all pent up over what was really nothing. She couldn't imagine Remus getting this upset over her; it would be ridiculous. 

Saying something would put everything into perspective and she could laugh it off. 

"Do you remember last night, in the common room?"  
"Of course, you came in just when…" Hermione trailed off. Something like understanding flashed across her face. "This is about Professor Lupin, isn't it?"  
Miserably Minerva nodded. "I think he's mad at me for what I said. I think I really hurt his feelings."  
  
Hermione chose her words with care. "You _could _have been more tactful," she temporised. 

"That's a nice way of putting it."

"Well…"  
"I laughed at him, Hermione. I think the man really meant what he was saying and _I laughed at him!_ He seemed hurt, in a way, when I snapped; I didn't take much notice then but now…"  
"Have you spoken with him at all since then?"  
She shook her head. "He avoided me at breakfast."

"Oh." Hermione fell silent. Finally she said, "You think he's really angry?"  
"I don't know." She laughed miserably. "_I _would be."  
"_I'd_ be darned upset!" the girl replied. "Maybe he feels you put him on the spot or something."  
"Maybe… I don't know. I don't know how he feels about anything and I don't feel like asking him. He won't say anything, but I think I hurt him."

Inwardly Minerva was amazed at herself. How could she be telling so much to a mere student? She tried to imagine herself talking like this to Dumbledore and failed. He'd probably tell her she was worked up over nothing, prescribe her a 'nice butterbeer' and an early night. No, she couldn't talk to Albus Dumbledore about anything.

"Hmmm…" Hermione had drawn her legs up and now rested her chin on her knees. "I think you've got a lovely little guilt complex."  
"Well…"  
"You think he's mad at you, but you're mad at yourself because you laughed at him, because you made fun of what he said."

"Uh huh."

"Do you think he was really serious? It sounded like a joke to me, and I'm sure to everyone else who was there."

"That's what I would have thought too, but I think I saw something you didn't, Hermione. There was this strange look in his eyes that I don't think I've ever seen there before. Something about him, that said even though his voice was making a joke, his eyes were telling the truth. And then when I laughed, there was real hurt in his eyes."

The girl made a noncommital noise. "Maybe. Are you sure?"  
"Oh, I don't know. Yes. Maybe. I think so. Yes, I think I hurt him, otherwise why else would he be avoiding me?"  
Hermione frowned. "You seem to be pretty caught up on him avoiding you. How do you know he didn't just want to talk to someone else at breakfast?"

  
She laughed and it fell flat. "Remus…Remus is like the best friend I have, he's always there. Every day since he resumed teaching here last year, we've sat together at breakfast. It's not what we talk about; it's just that we always make a point of sitting in the same spots, every day… Today's the only day when he's sat anywhere else, just as far from me as he could get."

"Because you laughed at him when he said he loved you?"  
  
Minerva winced. It sounded so cold, so harsh, when said by someone else. 

"Maybe you should just talk to him. I mean, Professor McGonagall, what would you do if he _were_ serious? Would you…oh, I don't know…this is going to sound crude…would you love him in return? Do you return his feelings?"  
  
Minerva McGonagall stared at her miserably. She blinked rapidly but the tears kept coming. 

"That's just it, Hermione, I _don't know!_" 

She grabbed another handful of tissues and mopped her stinging eyes. She sobbed loudly, breaking off into another mini wail when Hermione handed her more tissues. 

"I don't know! I don't have one flaming little clue! All I know is that I've lost my best friend and I've hurt him and I never wanted to and I've got him mad at me and I miss him! I don't know if he loves me and I don't know if I love him!"  
  
Hermione regarded her grimly. _She _knew, alright. And just as soon as she got out of there she was going to find Ron and tell him she _did_ want to go out with him, after all. 


	4. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Four

****

NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 4 

__

Catherine E. Grant

****

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. That going, Katie Powley, Damien Edgeworth and anyone else that hasn't been used by J.K. Rowling are mine in every sense of the word. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"-Yes, that's indeed why Boggarts like dark enclosed spaces! Well done, Mr Edgeworth. Take ten points to Hufflepuff." 

Remus Lupin was at the front of his Defence against the Dark Arts class with his third year Hufflepuffs. They were a bright bunch, and very responsive to his teaching. Not that Remus had any trouble with students except the Slytherins. But then again, he was used to that.

"Can anyone tell me what the most important thing to remember about Boggarts is?" 

Several rows of blank faces stared up at him, and Remus sighed. "Okay, well…"

"I know, I know!"

"Yes, Miss Powley?" 

"Boggarts become exactly what you fear! They see into your mind and pick out the biggest thing that you're afraid of and turn into it!" The short, dumpty girl beamed around with obvious pride as Lupin gave her house a further ten points. He had the sneaky suspicion that most of these kids never earned many points. Some of them, he'd say never.

A snicker attracted his attention. Damien Edgeworth had his hand over his mouth, chuckling. His seat mates appeared to be in on the joke, too, though everyone else looked puzzled. "Yes, Mr Edgeworth?"  
  
"_I _thought they turned into Professor Snape, sir." The class broke into laughter. Remus allowed himself a slight smile. So the story of that had been passed down, had it? Now that he thought about it, there was somewhat of a resemblance to Neville Longbottom about Damien's innocent features. He rather suspected that this was Neville's cousin.

He set an assignment and saw the class to starting their work before taking the chance to sit down at his desk. He tried to relax, but found it difficult. After the way Minerva had snapped at him the previous night, he knew he had absolutely no chance at winning her affections. Only kiss him after she'd been proposed to by Snape, indeed! Everyone at Hogwarts knew how much the man hated her, and vice versa. Unless… Unless Minerva didn't really hate Severus. If she liked him, instead of Lupin, that could explain a lot of things. Remus wondered miserably just how high on her list of disliked people he really was.

Idly he played with a quill and doodled funny lines over a spare piece of parchment. A squiggle there, add another curvy line there… He never really noticed what he was drawing. A paper fight in the back row distracted him and he got up to sort it out. Remus never had a chance to return to his desk until the bell rang.

He stacked his quills neatly and nearly crumpled up the parchment to toss in the bin when he noticed what he'd actually drawn on it. There, in green ink, were the words

**__**

Remus

Loves

Minerva

encircled in a heart, with small hearts sketched around them. He gulped and was about to pick it up when it was snatched out of his hand. "I'll take this, if you don't mind."  
  
It was Professor Snape.


	5. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Five

### NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 5

Author: Catherine E. Grant **__**

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Uh, Severus, how nice to see you," Remus managed weakly. He made a snatch at the parchment but Snape whisked it out of his reach. Carefully he folded it and placed it inside his robes. He smiled, a cold, thin-lipped smile.

"We couldn't have you destroying evidence, now could we, _Professor_ Lupin?"  
  
Remus frowned. "Evidence? What on earth do you mean?"  
  
Snape looked, if anything, like a cat given a palace made of catnip and cream. "Why, evidence that you have a fixation on Professor McGonagall. She's never given you any indication that she returns your sweet, touching little feelings. Oh, have no illusions, I know all about your lovely little display in the Gryffindor common room last night. As far as any court will be concerned, that, and this, are just further proof that you are obsessed with her, and I believe have been, ever since you were a student… I intend to prove that you are obsessed with her, and harbour unsavoury feelings that could easily get out of control and endanger the life of our Deputy Headmistress." He smirked triumphantly.

"_Endanger the life? _I'd never do a thing to hurt Minerva! Severus, surely you would know that!"  
  
"I know only what I've seen," the hook-nosed man replied icily, "and all that I've seen points to an unhealthy, unrequited fixation."  
  
"Severus!" Remus stared at him in anguish. If this was publicised as a obsession case, it wouldn't matter if Minerva hated him or not. All it would need would be for Snape to say that he thought Remus was dangerously fixated, and then no matter what he said, what he was would work against him. The word of a werewolf against a senior teacher would have absolutely no standing whatsoever. Even with no testimony from Minerva, he'd still very likely be dismissed, just 'to stop anything developing further.' There were people at the Ministry of Magic that would just jump at the chance to get him out of Hogwarts.

And that was just what Snape wanted. When Remus was dismissed, Severus Snape, the hero, the man who knew just how dangerous and unstable a werewolf could be, would be most likely given the Defence against the Dark Arts position as a reward. He could imagine the greasy, oily man smiling at the reporters, giving interview after interview to Rita Skeeter, shaking the hand of all the important Ministry officials.

It made him feel sick.

Guardedly he said, "What would you gain from my dismissal, Severus?"  
The man smiled horribly. "What would I gain?" He laughed. There was no merriment in that tone. "What do you think?"  
"You want my job."  
"Partly."  
"Partly?" Remus was puzzled.

Snape snarled, his face twisted into the warped lines of anger. 

"Do you think I like you, _werewolf_? Perhaps you think I cherish your company? The man who released Sirius Black, when I had him within my grasp. The man who constantly mocks me at every turn! But you don't see it like that, do you, Lupin? Oh no, with you everything's just all merriment and light. 

"You blunder your way through life, not caring what you do or who you hurt. Well I'm telling you, I'm not going to let you hurt Minerva McGonagall. If it is the last thing I do, I'm going to see that you're not around to play her for a fool. Because, you know what? You don't deserve her. I won't let you have her!" 

His voice was getting louder and he had backed Remus into a corner of the room. Snape raised a furious hand and placed it heavily on Lupin's throat. 

Softly, he hissed "I bet you've never known what it's like to _truly_ suffer, _Remus._ Never known what it's like to want something so bad and not have any chance of getting it. When you waltz in, everyone just turns their bellies up and lets Dumbledore's little friend just take whatever he darned well pleases. But not me. You just happen to want the one thing I'm not prepared to give up." 

Remus swallowed heavily. Snape glared at him a moment longer before drawing his hand away. The other massaged his throat gingerly. "You never had her in the first place, Severus," he said quietly, trying to judge the hatred in those dark eyes. It seemed fathomless.

"Do you think so? She'd be mine in a moment if you weren't around, monkeying with her mind. All she sees is the bright little golden boy you want her to see. She needs _me_ to see what an underhanded, scheming creep you really are. And I'll show her when I prove to everyone that you're a danger to her. You'll be out in a cloud of disgrace and _I'll_ be the one Minerva turns to." Snape's beady eyes gleamed malevolently. 

When Remus said nothing he smiled. "Pack your bags, wolf-boy," he hissed, "because I'm about to buy you a one way ticket on the Hogwarts Express."

When Snape came swaggering out, he looked mightily pleased with himself. Triumphantly he pulled the piece of parchment from his robe and held it up. If Snape were a kissing man, he would have given it a beauty.

He marched down the corridor. As he turned the corner, Remus could hear him whistling.


	6. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Six

****

NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 6

Author: Catherine E. Grant

**__**

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

__

Two weeks later…

Ginny, Ron, Harry and Hermione sat drinking butterbeers outside the Three Broomsticks, Hogsmeade. It was generally understood that the friends were firmly paired off now, and if that made a few others grind their teeth or sigh wistfully, none of that reached their ears. 

Harry was blushing as Ginny excitedly related some tale of his quidditch prowess. Hermione and Ron wore identical indulgent looks; the latter was still trying to believe his luck that Hermione was interested in him. She'd come to a decision so suddenly… He pinched himself each morning just to make sure. 

Ginny paused long enough in her narrative to take another gulp of the foaming liquid. "Don't you ever stop, Gin?" her brother asked amusedly. She shot him a glance under lowered lashes. "What do you think, Ron?" the girl replied archly. "You've only been living with me, for oh, what, fifteen years?"  
He laughed. "Well…"

"Forget about it. I don't care whatever it was, just forget about it. I don't want to know what you were going to say."

"Aww…" Ron pulled a downcast face. Hermione jabbed him in the ribs. 

"You heard her," she mock teased. He sighed. 

"Yes ma'am." She rolled her eyes.

"Aw look, it's happy families hour," the snide voice of Draco Malfoy interrupted. As usual, he was flanked by his two goons, Crabbe and Goyle, who resembled nothing more than a failed experiment in genetic engineering to find the perfect monkey. They were apes, solidly built, with flabby jowls and sunken, beady little eyes. Neither was known for his intelligence. 

"Well, if it isn't the two Weasley wimps, Potter and Miss Mudblood. How romantic. Of course, I can see it from the Weasley point of view, you're going to have to marry for money to support the twenty muggle loving kids you're going to have, aren't you? Who better than the famous Harry Potter and a priggish little Mudblood to finance your brats?"  
  
He leered, and Ron was half out of his seat before Hermione laid a restraining hand on his arm. "Let it go, Ron," she advised quietly. Ron shrugged her hand off. His face was as red as his face. "Like Hell I will," he muttered angrily. 

"Malfoy, you arsehole…" 

Draco burst into exaggerated laughter. "Come on, Weasley, have a shot at me," he invited. At a slight gesture from him, Crabbe and Goyle inched forward. 

"Ron, no!" Harry jumped up from the table and tried to pull his friend back. Draco nodded sagely. "Listen to Potter, he knows you couldn't challenge me! Listen to your little Mudblood girlfriend, they know what's good for you."  
  
"I'm going to give you something that's good for you!" Ron snapped back, rolling up the sleeves of his robe. Pushing Harry away he tackled Draco, who fell against the ground still laughing mockingly. With a minimum of effort, the two other Slytherin thugs started pounding Ron. 

Harry took a swing at Goyle, who simply caught his wrist and held it aloft while Harry struggled. Hermione pulled out her wand. "Furnunculus!" she cried. Little tentacles sprouted on Goyle's massive features. Slowly, he let go of Harry and tried to wipe his face. 

Harry took out his own wand and used the chance to perform the jellylegs curse on him, while Ginny and Hermione cast several hexes on both Crabbe and Malfoy. They staggered up and Ron lunged at Malfoy once more. "Fight me properly, don't keep hiding behind your stupid goons!" he yelled, and punched Draco in the face. He stumbled backwards. Goyle brought his hand up and Hermione cursed him again.

Down he went. "Get up, damn you!" Ron stood over Draco's prostrate form and kicked the Slytherin in the ribs. The blonde boy simply lay there with a sneer on his face, laughing. 

"That'll be quite enough of that," Professor Lupin said firmly. He waded into the melee and righted the table they'd knocked over. "Mr Malfoy, Mr Weasley, here please." They obeyed sullenly. 

With a single countercharm he reversed the effect of the curses on the Slytherins. Hermione could be seen surreptitiously slipping a notebook and quill from her robes to scribble it down.

"Now, what on earth happened here?" 

No one spoke. 

Lupin frowned. "Well?" he demanded. "You can't have a brawl in the middle of Hogsmeade without a good reason. I'm waiting." 

"Malfoy called Hermione a mudblood and insulted our family, Professor," Ron said finally, embarrassed. Ginny chewed on her lip and looked at the ground.

Lupin nodded thoughtfully. "Mr Malfoy, Mr Goyle, Mr Crabbe? What have you got to say?"  
  
Malfoy smirked. "Oh, nothing, Professor. We were just minding our own business when Weasley came up and attacked me. You can see my robes." He indicated the torn sleeve and frayed, dirty splotches across his clothes. Ron's, being older, were in worse condition. He scowled.

"That's not true! He provoked me! He's just a dirty, insulting, aggravating, arrogant son of-"

"That's _enough_, Mr Weasley," the professor interrupted smoothly. "I'm very disappointed in all of you. Thirty points from Slytherin; Misters Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle should report to my office tonight for a detention. That will be all."   
  
He walked off. 

Draco spat on the dirt in disgust. "Be seeing you, Weasley, Potter, Mudblood," he said coldly. "Come on, you two, we still have to go to Zonko's."  
  
The four Gryffindors stood quietly while the Slytherins stalked off haughtily. More correctly, _Draco_ stalked; his sidekicks plodded along like two baby elephants in his wake.

Harry said cheerfully, "Well, that's the thing with Professor Lupin, he's fair and can be relied upon to give you a good deal!"  
"If you happen to be in Gryffindor," Ginny remarked, sliding her arm through Harry's. He grinned. Ron laughed and smoothed down his robes. "Seeing the look on Malfoy's face when Lupin took points off Slytherin and gave them detention made the whole thing worthwhile." He winced. "Think I've busted my ribs. Ouch."   
  
Hermione put a solicitous hand tenderly on his ribs. "You should see Madame Pomfrey," she said quietly. Something about this whole thing was bothering her. She'd been watching both Professors Lupin and McGonagall after McGonagall's words of a fortnight ago, and something just wasn't right. Either Lupin was more put out than either of them had realised, or there was something very wrong in the state of Hogwarts. And she intended to find out what it was.

"Hermione? Hey, you in there?"  
She stuck out her tongue in response to Ron's teasing.

"Yeah, whatdya reckon, Rambo?"   
He was puzzled. "Muggle joke," she quickly explained. Thoughtfully she said, "I'm not too happy about this. Something isn't right here. Lupin's not one to play favourites, no matter what. I don't get it."  
  
"Don't worry about it," Ron advised lightly, "it hardly matters since we came out on top, does it?"  
  
"I don't know," Hermione frowned. "I don't know."  
  
Spying a familiar face several doors along, she added "Look, why don't you head along to Honeydukes and get that stuff you wanted? I'll catch up with you later. I've got to go speak with Professor McGonagall about something."  
  
Harry nodded, Ginny sighed and Ron rolled his eyes. "Really, Mione, do you have to go running off to McGonagall after every little thing that happens?"

"Only when it's important," she told him firmly. Leaning over, Hermione gave him a gentle kiss. "Catch ya later, okay?"  
  
"That's just like Hermione, isn't it?" Harry commented as soon as she was out of earshot. "She comes to Hogsmeade with us and then goes running off to talk to a teacher about something. If there was a library here she'd be in that too."  
Ginny snorted. "There is," she murmured. "I just don't think anyone's told Hermione that yet."  
  
"Thank God," replied her brother.


	7. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Seven

### NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 7

Author: Catherine E. Grant

**__**

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Minerva McGonagall hadn't been having a very good day. By now, she was firmly convinced that Remus totally hated her for what she'd said to him, and was getting more depressed each day. They'd barely exchanged ten words in all this time, and even that consisted of such pleasantries as "Pass the ink," in the staffroom, marking papers.

Snape, in contrast, seemed to be there whenever she turned around. Yesterday she could have sworn he'd washed his hair and put on some cologne.

Even stranger, the day before someone had left a single, black rose on the step outside her quarters. Underneath it she'd found a plain piece of parchment with a heart sketched on it. A knife protruded from the heart, a wolf's head on the hilt. It disturbed her more than she was willing to admit. 

She burnt both the flower and the drawing.

If it had occurred under any different circumstances, she would have dismissed it as a student playing a particularly silly joke, but now she wasn't quite so sure. There was something in the way Snape was behaving that sent tremors down her spine, and it wasn't from excitement.

The man was creepy. She'd have to watch him.

If only she didn't see so much of him as it was!  
  
Minerva turned away from the window of the bookshop she'd been gazing into and there he was, lounging in the doorway. "See anything you like?" he asked conversationally. She shook her head. "No, actually there's nothing. But I always look, I love bookshops."  
  
She did. She would have spent most of the day in there if Snape didn't seem determined to block the entrance.

"Oh, come now Minerva, there has to be something," he pressed, "something in there has to have caught your fancy."  
  
"No, I haven't seen anything," she said quite firmly and much less conversationally. He was beginning to seriously annoy her.

"Perhaps a nice butterbeer?" Snape fell into step beside her as she walked away from the bookshop. "No, thank you," Minerva replied automatically. 

"Something to eat?"  
"I ate before I left Hogwarts. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some shopping to do." She ducked into a small store that proved to be a florist and gift store.

"Ah, Minerva, excellent choice," Snape commented in that oily voice of his. "Some flowers?"  
"No, _thank you_, Severus."  
"Surely someone like yourself would appreciate a flower or two?"  
And just what was _that_ supposed to mean, Minerva wondered. She was very close to grinding her teeth. 

"Very well, Severus," she said coldly. "Recently, a black rose and a rather 'interesting' drawing were left on my doorstep, and I didn't appreciate it at all. Someone's idea of a sick joke, no doubt."

"You don't like roses?"   
"Not black ones!" She retorted.

"Really? Minerva, I would have thought a rose, of any kind, could be taken as romantic."  
She surveyed him angrily, not trying to keep the irritation out of her voice. "Black roses? Certainly not ones that come with a picture of a heart with a knife through it! A prank, no doubt."  
"Or a warning."  
"A warning?"  
Snape nodded. "Throughout history, black roses have been used as a symbol of death or domination. That someone should think you leave you one… And the picture… My dear Professor, I suggest that you be careful who you associate with."  
"I'll do that," she commented guardedly. And if he went away she could start immediately.

By the heavens that man could be annoying.

The saleslady sprang up from behind the counter and dropped her copy of Witch Weekly. "Sir, Madam, is there anything I could help you with?"   
  
"No, just browsing," Minerva said hastily at the same time Snape oozed, "Yes, actually I believe there is." He leant close to the girl to say something, and Minerva pretended to be looking amongst the flowers. When she next looked up they were deep in conversation and Snape's back was to her. 

She slipped out of the store as fast as she could. 

"Thank goodness," she murmured softly, "Maybe Severus has found a girlfriend."  
  
Quickly she strode along the street, careful to check the reflections of the store windows for Snape. She seemed to have escaped him. Breathing a sigh of relief, Minerva stopped outside a robe shop and contemplated going in when a light touch fell on her shoulder. She nearly screamed.

"Severus, I told you I didn't want anything! Oh… Miss Granger." Minerva managed a shaky smile. She said a silent prayer. 

Hermione grinned back. "Professor, could I talk to you a moment? It's about Professor Lupin…"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
"What!?" Minerva gasped. Hermione Granger had just related the tale of the fight and even she found it hard to believe. 

"Remus, just doing that? Maybe it was the Slytherins' fault-"

"It was," Hermione hastened to assure her.

"-but that's hardly warranted. I don't believe it. That's something certain _other_ individuals would do, not Remus…"  
"Certain other individuals like Snape."  
"_Professor _Snape, not that I would stoop to implicating any of my colleagues."  
  
Hermione said, "Professor Lupin seems to be acting very strangely the past two weeks."  
  
Minerva gave a dry laugh. "Yes, and it's all my fault."  
The girl shook her head, a thoughtful expression on her face. "No," she said finally. "No, I don't think so. Professor McGonagall, has he spoken to you at all?"  
"Not much, just, you know, little things."  
"He seems worried about something."  
"Well, I guess he's got every right to, doesn't he? Because when I-"

Hermione rolled her eyes in exasperation. Did the woman _ever _let up? "Professor!"  
"-offended him I know I really hurt him-"

"_Professor_!"

"-and it's no wonder that he's upset-"

"PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL!" Hermione barely stopped herself from adding the words "Shut the hell up," but remembered who she was talking to just in time. McGonagall seemed to have let her into her confidence in these few weeks, but she had no illusions that the friendship would stretch that far. McGonagall was, after all, the Head of her House and the Deputy Head, and would only tolerate so much. Hermione was of the opinion she'd only been told anything because she was such a good student and what Ron would call a teacher's pet.

It had its uses.

"Professor," she added gently when the woman fell quiet. "Professor. I don't think this is anything to do with you. I think it's something else entirely that's worrying him, but then, I'm just a student and can't talk to him much."

And, she added silently, if you're at all concerned about him you ought to jump to that bait and offer to go find out what's bothering him.

Hermione hid a smirk. She loved being a matchmaker.

"Well…" McGonagall said thoughtfully. "If you're sure it's nothing to do with me…"

"Oh, I'm sure." Hermione gave a bright, sunny and completely artificial smile. "It's probably something to do with, you know, his situation… Maybe the Ministry's giving him trouble or something and he's upset about it."  
"Maybe."  
"But then, I wouldn't know anything. I only see him in class time."  
  
Minerva nodded, thinking. Hermione crossed her fingers, but the woman never saw it, caught up in her own thoughts. Finally her green eyes fastened themselves on Hermione's, and though they were troubled there was a new resolution in them. "You're right," she said quietly. "Maybe I should go speak to him. If there's anything bothering him, I can find out, and I might be able to clean up the whole other mess at the same time."  
  
"Well, if you're sure…" she pretended to be dubious. "You wouldn't want to push him…"  
"No, I'm certain." Minerva smiled and she was certainly a lot happier than she had been ten minutes ago. "Thank you Hermione, I'll go see him as soon as I can."  
  
The professor and the student parted ways; McGonagall to the Three Broomsticks and Hermione to Honeydukes.

Neither of them saw Severus Snape lurking in the narrow alleyway beside the tiny shop, gnashing his teeth. He glared after Hermione and muttered something under his breath. With a rustle of parchment, he withdrew a folded document and stared at it thoughtfully.

Then he smiled. It was time.


	8. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Eight

****

NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 8

__

Catherine E. Grant

****

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twenty-four hours can have a lot of difference on your perspective, Minerva McGonagall decided. She couldn't remember what on earth she'd been thinking when she'd agreed to go talk to Remus about what was bothering him. A slightly suspicious imp that lurked in a corner of her mind said the Granger girl manipulated her, but then his counterpart would jump up and yell that Minerva was too smart just to be used, and she'd have to already want to do something before she'd let anyone manipulate her into doing it.

Minerva, on the other hand, wasn't quite sure of either opinion. The previous night at dinner she'd made sure she sat down the far end of the table, but Remus hadn't shown. All her efforts brought her was an earful of Simona Sinistra's plans for updating the Astronomy tower, because she was the Deputy Headmistress and could _undoubtably_ persuade Dumbledore better than anyone else. 

Minerva could only wish. She'd caught Dumbledore's eye a few times during the meal and there was definitely amusement there. He never approached her about her new seating arrangement, and she suspected that he'd told Hagrid not to say anything either. Dumbledore knew more than he was letting on. But then again, that was only normal. 

The woman sighed, tiredly. Briefly she caught a glimpse of herself in her bedroom mirror, and it made her frown. Had those lines been there yesterday? Her skin was extremely pale and looked liked she'd barely slept. Had she? She couldn't remember. Probably not. After Snape cornered her in her office and _insisted _she come down to the Potions lab to examine a new shipment of books he'd ordered, she hadn't been thinking too well. Perhaps there was something in the air down there, or maybe it was just Snape. She decided to be charitable and blame the potion residue. After a while, it could make _anyone_ seem a little strange.

Carefully she loosened her hair, wincing as a strand got caught in the clasp. Minerva brushed it, humming slightly to herself as she did. No matter what anyone told her, she'd always found this a restful activity, even though she'd rarely been able to bring herself to wear her hair down outside her quarters.

It'd get tangled, she reasoned, knowing as she made the excuse that it was only part of the reason. Minerva couldn't bring herself to make any great change in her appearance because she knew it'd bring talk, and she didn't want people gossiping about her. She'd be too embarrassed, though she'd do her best to hide it.

Stroke, stroke. The glistening black tresses curled themselves around the brush. Unbound, they hung to her waist. Minerva was proud to think that she could honestly claim there was no grey in her hair whatsoever, despite the fact she'd just passed her fortieth birthday.

Forty. She winced. It seemed so old, somehow, when she tried to think just what she'd achieved in that time. She'd gone straight from being a student at Hogwarts to being a teacher at Hogwarts, to Head of her House and the Deputy Headmistress. Career wise, it was a good life and she knew she'd certainly done well for herself. Personally, Minerva didn't have one thing that she could call a good achievement. 

Perhaps, just over a fortnight ago, she would have named her friendship with Remus if she'd been asked that question, but she could hardly say that now. 

Minerva McGonagall bit her lip and studied her reflection in the glass. She straightened her glasses. Part of her wanted to leave her glasses off, because she knew Remus liked that, but she left them on thinking that would be a little forward.

She wasn't going to try and seduce him, for Heaven's sake! She wasn't even going to be too personal. Just a nice, friendly little chat, that's all it was going to be, and maybe they could mend the bridges she still blamed herself for burning. Then, maybe, he could help her work out a way to get Snape off her tail.

__

That prospect made her smile.

Minerva left her quarters and crossed into her office, careful to pull the connecting door closed behind her. Now to all eyes it had the semblance of a flat piece of panelling, and no one, on seeing it, would be able to pick it as _the _panel that concealed her quarters.

Yawning, Minerva promised herself she'd stop by the kitchens and pick up something to eat once she'd finished at Remus'. She couldn't imagine she'd be there long, since he was probably still a little sore at her. First things first. Mend the friendship tentatively first, before jumping into a ravine and waiting for him to pull her out.

"What in the world?" Minerva murmured softly, stooping to take another look at her doorstep. It was the same doorstep as it was earlier, but she was certain then that it hadn't been wearing a bunch of red roses. Slowly she picked them up, and counted them. Thirteen. Was that supposed to be significant? 

Minerva breathed deeply, holding the flowers gently. She had to admit they were very beautiful, and the person who had noticed that she loved roses had to be very perceptive indeed. Perhaps…

"Flowers, Minerva?" The greasy tones of Severus Snape intruded themselves on her special moment and Minerva could have cursed him. She contented herself with saying tersely, "Yes, Severus, it appears so," in the coldest tones she could manage. He raised one sketchy brow, and drawled, "Quite…interesting. Would you mind signing this for me?" 

Snape proffered a role of parchment. Minerva took it, noting amusedly that it was a detention list of first year Gryffindors. She scrawled her name quickly, hoping to chase him away as soon as possible. Trust him to be lurking around her office at this time of night. Didn't the man have a life of his own?

"Thank you for that, Minerva." Snape smiled smoothly, taking back his list and quill. "I wouldn't have bothered you with it but I need your approval to institute this detention program for students in your house, and I need to have this list ready by tomorrow morning. Good night."   
  
He oozed off down the passageway and Minerva watched him go quietly. Talking with Severus Snape always left a bad taste in her mouth. There was just something about him…

Her special moment rather spoiled, she carefully took the flowers inside and laid them on a little table. The black tissue paper rustled in response, dislodging a little note that had been wedged in amongst the stalks. Minerva lifted it out with trembling hands. No one had ever given her a bunch of flowers before.

But the note was a disappointment, and she had to let out the breath she hadn't realised she was holding. It was just the card of a florist, in Hogsmeade, giving their name and thanking - someone – for their purchase. Her name was written on it in green ink. The handwriting was somewhat familiar. 

Minerva smiled slightly, replacing the card by the beautiful roses. She had no definite proof, but she knew in her heart just who was responsible for giving her these flowers.


	9. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Nine

### NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 9

__

Author: Catherine E. Grant

****

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. Simona Sinistra's first name belongs to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Minerva knocked tremulously on the door of Remus' office. Though it was shut, she could see a slight light peeping out around the edges that indicated someone was still at work. "Remus?" 

Come on, answer the door. 

She felt like a fool waiting expectantly outside. But then, she was a fool, wasn't she? A right little fool for thinking he was mad at her. He was probably avoiding her because he thought that she was mad at him; she hadn't exactly been very nice even _after_ that infamous evening. Surely, Remus wanted to give her time. He'd just given her the flowers to show he still cared.

A warm feeling flooded Minerva's heart. She felt like a schoolgirl on her first date. Then again, if all turned out well, it would _be_ her first date. She might not be a schoolgirl any longer, but she was certainly more inexperienced than most. Nervously she patted her hair. It felt awkward, having it down like this. Awkward, but nice. 

"Remus?" She called again, and again there was no answer.   
"Remus?" Maybe he'd gone to bed and just left the light on. Maybe he was in his office, but too busy working to have heard her.

Withdrawing her wand, she pointed it at the lock and said _"Alohomora!"_

The door swung inwards, and Minerva saw immediately why Remus hadn't answered her calls. 

He was, indeed, too busy.

Simona Sinistra was in his arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

__

Meanwhile…

Severus Snape stood triumphantly in Dumbledore's office, next to a seriously concerned Cornelius Fudge. In his hands Fudge held Remus' scrawl, and he was listening attentively to the potion master's accusations. 

Snape said: "I think you'll have to agree with my conclusions, sir. Professor Lupin has demonstrated on numerous occasions an unstable psychological complex as far as Professor McGonagall is concerned, and I feel it would be a danger to her to allow him to stay on at Hogwarts. You've informed us already how dangerous it could possibly be to allow a werewolf on the school grounds, Minister," and here he inclined his head smoothly in Fudge's direction. Fudge stroked his beard, smiling to himself.

Dumbledore, on the other hand, was frowning. "Really, Severus?" he asked in a neutral voice. "Professor Lupin is no danger to anyone when he transforms as long as you continue you brew him the Wolfsbane potion. I trust that you _are_ brewing him the potion, Severus?"  
"Of course, Headmaster."  
"Then there appears to me to be no problem."  
"Just a moment, now, Albus," Fudge interrupted pompously, "It seems to me you've overlooked the serious nature of the accusations against Professor Lupin, that have nothing to do with him being a – er- a werewolf, and everything to do with him having a – er – fixation of a possibly dangerous nature."  
  
"What do you determine dangerous, Cornelius?"   
"Well, I, er, that is, Professor Snape here…"  
"I believe, Headmaster, that I should outline the facts here again," Snape commented evenly.

"One: Professor Lupin made several – inappropriate - statements to Professor McGonagall within the hearing of a large number of students, a couple of weeks ago. In essence, a forceful declaration of love. I know _that_ from two loud-mouthed Gryffindor students who found it interesting enough to talk about through potions. According to them, she was quite adverse to Mr Lupin's comments, and that can certainly be seen in the way she's barely spoken to him in the past three weeks. If Mr Lupin was offended by Professor McGonagall's reply, it could have pushed him into further, even more inappropriate actions. 

"Two: The written evidence here, in Professor Lupin's own handwriting, made during a class period, which suggests he cannot get his thoughts off her during what should be a fairly innocuous period of time.

"Three: One, black rose was left on her doorstep as, and I quote, 'a sick joke,' several days ago. It was accompanied by a drawing of a heart with a knife through it, that had a wolf's head on the hilt. She mentioned this in casual conversation to myself at Hogsmeade. She also stated that she would endeavour to be careful of the people she associates with. This represents, in my mind, that Minerva is seriously worried about someone 'stalking' her. I need not remind _you_, Minister, of the connotations of black roses."

"Four: Thirteen red roses were left outside her door this evening, wrapped in black tissue paper. I became aware of this when I visited Minerva's office approximately one hour ago, in order to get her approval of a detention I intend to give some Gryffindor students."  
  
"Yes, well, that's all very interesting, Severus, but what proof do you have that Remus Lupin left the flowers?" Dumbledore queried. Snape smiled and affected an innocent expression. "Why, none at all, Headmaster," he said guilelessly, watching the Minister of Magic carefully.

Fudge seemed worried. Thoughtfully he stroked his beard. "This concerns me deeply," he commented quietly. "Anyone could have left those flowers, but in the light of Mr Lupin's rather forceful declaration of – er – his feelings, and Professor McGonagall's rejection… I concur with Professor Snape that he could have easily been very offended. We have a note, that I have proven to my satisfaction was written by the same Professor Lupin, displaying his emotions, and circumstantial evidence of someone showering Professor McGonagall with unwanted attention. Perhaps the black rose and the drawing can be seen as a warning, that if she didn't accept the red roses, something bad would happen to her."  
  
"The red roses meaning Lupin's affection," Fudge said.

Snape nodded. The Minister seemed firmly convinced. Dumbledore remained sceptical. "Perhaps… you can't prove though that the flowers are from him. Someone might be trying to set Lupin up." He directed an unfathomable glance at Snape. 

The professor smiled, and didn't reply. If he were guilty, he wouldn't admit it. 

"I doubt it, Professor!" Cornelius Fudge huffed scornfully. "As far as I am concerned, the matter is serious, and the matter is closed. Remus Lupin will be dismissed immediately!"

"Minister…"  
"I'm sorry, Albus. But you see…" Fudge spread his hands wide and looked sorrowfully at Dumbledore. "There is no doubt whatsoever in my mind that Remus Lupin, after being scorned by Professor McGonagall, has developed a possibly exceedingly dangerous obsession for her. I don't need to explain to you, Albus, the way such a man's mind could work. 

"He becomes firmly convinced that the object of his affection belongs to him, and if he can't have her he'll make sure she pays for rejecting him. With Lupin being a werewolf and all… If he decided to use that as a weapon, and simply neglected to take the Wolfsbane potion one full moon, we'd have a powerful, rampaging werewolf running through Hogwarts. In human form he may only want to harm Professor McGonagall, but as a werewolf, _everyone _is in danger." He shuddered dramatically and planted a fist on Dumbledore's desk. 

"Albus, the man is a menace. To Professor McGonagall, and possibly to all of Hogwarts. I'm sorry. I know you were close to him."  
"And I still am," the Headmaster replied coldly. "I don't abandon my friends when they are accused of something. If you take him to court, I'll stand up as a character witness for him."

This could be a serious impediment to his plan! Dumbledore was one of the most respected wizards in the world. Snape started to get worried. 

"Minister," he said softly. "Perhaps it wouldn't be necessary to charge Professor Lupin with anything, if we could only remove him from where he could be a danger."  
Fudge stroked his beard again. "I suppose we _could_ just dismiss the man…"  
"That's a _very_ good idea, Minister," Snape encouraged smoothly. Dumbledore gave him another inscrutable look. 

"Do you think so?" Fudge looked pleased.

"Absolutely, sir. It's a generous decision that achieves the purpose you desire. Another _excellent_ decision on your part, I must say." He gave a slight, thin lipped smile. The Minister puffed up like a helium balloon.

"Well," he drawled out slowly. "Well, indeed." His beady eyes glowed and he beamed with pleasure.   
  
"Professor Dumbledore, might I say you have a _very _intelligent associate here? Of the finest calibre, obviously. Why, I'm sure Professor Snape would be an excellent choice for _either_ of our positions when we retire. Don't you think so, Severus?"  
  
"I'm hardly in a position to comment, Minister," he answered suavely, "But if you say so, then I am deeply honoured."  
  
Fudge clapped him on the back. "That's my man," he said warmly. "Severus, you should visit me at the Ministry sometime. You'd really make a great Minister of Magic!"  
  
Dumbledore murmured, "Gods deliver us all."


	10. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Ten

### NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 10

**__**

Author: Catherine E. Grant

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. Simona Sinistra's first name is mine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Minerva gasped. "Remus?" she whispered. She felt horrible and clutched the doorframe for support. Her cheeks burned with a mixture of embarrassment and betrayal.

Lupin and Sinistra sprang apart and stared at her. "Minerva?" Remus asked curiously. He glanced at the door. "Didn't I leave that locked?"  
She nodded, silently. Remus walked over to her, seemingly concerned. "Why did you come in here? Minerva, is everything all right?" He put a gentle hand on her shoulder and she threw it off. 

"Don't you touch me!"   
"Minerva? What is it?"  
"That's a fine thing for you to be asking! Get away from me!" The woman pushed him away, alarmed at the tears that had begun building in her eyes. "Some friend you turned out to be," she muttered. 

Lupin was confused. "I don't understand," he admitted. 

Minerva glared at him. He was saddened at the anger he heard in her voice. Her lips were thin as she smiled; a cold, mirthless smile that never reached her eyes. 

"Perhaps Simona will explain it to you," she stated coolly.

Silently, defiantly, she glared at him. He still wore the same puzzled, hurt expression. Minerva would once have been upset if she'd caused him to look that way, but she was too furious to care any longer.

"Good night, Remus," she said in the cold, quiet tones that are normally reserved for last goodbyes. Stiffly she turned on her heel and stalked out.

He stared. "What the-? Simona do you have any idea-"

The redhead blotted her own eyes and pushed quickly past him, running out into the corridor after Minerva. "Stay here!" she snapped as she passed. Lupin threw up his hands. "Well, I wasn't going anywhere!" He called after her. "This is, after all, _my_ office!"  
  
Remus looked at the empty doorway for a moment. Then he sat heavily down at his desk, and rested his head in his hands. What had he done? Minerva looked like he'd tried to kill her. The haunting, betrayed expression that she had worn tore at him. Somehow, some way, he'd managed to do something to hurt the woman he loved, and he didn't have a damn clue what.

Footsteps outside his door made him look up. Simona and Minerva? Maybe now he'd get some answers.

His hopes died as the heavy, oakwood door swung aside and Professor Dumbledore entered. Behind him walked Cornelius Fudge and Severus Snape.

Snape was smiling the happiest smile to ever cross his sallow face.

"Remus," Dumbledore began, quietly.

"I know," he answered. 

"Mr Fudge wants to ask you to leave Hogwarts. I just want you to know that you don't have to do as he says. You can fight this, Remus, and I'm prepared to stand beside you all of the way."  
Remus smiled weakly. "Thank you, Albus," he said. "Would it change anything if I said I'm not guilty?"  
  
"No," Fudge replied.


	11. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Eleven

****

NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 11

Author: Catherine E. Grant

**__**

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Perhaps," Dumbledore said at the same time.

The Minister of Magic looked upset. "Now, Albus, we went over this," he said in a warning tone. "You know as well as I do that Lupin is going to deny everything. But we have proof."  
"Circumstantial."  
"Proof nonetheless."  
"That's hardly enough to convict anyone."  
"May I remind you, Headmaster, that we don't _want_ to convict Mr Lupin? He is only to leave Hogwarts, not stand trial."  
  
"You think I'm obsessed," Remus observed quietly. Dumbledore and Fudge turned to look at him. Snape hadn't taken his eyes off him. 

"That's the general consensus," Fudge snapped.

"I'm not," he replied. "If you want obsessed, I suggest you talk with Professor Snape here. He could tell you all about fixations."  
"Why, Minister, Headmaster, I'm sure I don't have any idea what he's talking about," Snape interjected.

Dumbledore said, "I'm not. Keep talking, Mr. Lupin."

"I think you'll have a sketch, a picture, a heart, with my name and Minerva's in it?" Remus hazarded. The Headmaster nodded. "I admit I drew that, in one of my classes. Just doodling, you understand."  
"We understand," Fudge interrupted.

Remus nodded urbanely. "I'm glad, Minister. I was about to destroy it when Severus snatched it out of my hand, claiming he wanted to use it as evidence in an obsession case he planned to build against me."  
  
Snape laughed. "That's preposterous."  
"He also said," Lupin continued, "that I 'didn't know what it was like to want something so much and not have a chance of getting it.' He accused me of 'not deserving Minerva.'"

"Did he say anything about who did?"  
"Headmaster, that's the biggest load of-"

"Silence, Severus!" Dumbledore snapped. "Mr Lupin, did he say who _did_ 'deserve' Minerva?"  
"He implied that he did, sir."  
"You believe that Professor Snape orchestrated this in an attempt to have you sent away from Hogwarts?"  
"Yes."  
Remus could feel the fury in Snape's gaze boring into him. He placed a cautious hand on his wand. "Albus, it's no secret that Severus isn't very fond of me," he continued, talking only to the Headmaster. 

Dumbledore nodded, thoughtfully. His face was a mask of impassiveness. Fudge began to splutter. "Why, Albus, you don't really believe this, do you?" 

The older wizard fixed him with a firm glare. "As a matter of fact, Cornelius," he replied, "I _do_ believe Professor Lupin. I find his story far more believable than that of Professor Snape's."

"But Severus-"

"Severus can speak for himself!"

Snape smiled, thinly. "It's only natural that the werewolf would want to accuse me in order to clear himself," he remarked.

Cornelius Fudge nodded emphatically. 

The potion master continued, "Perhaps he wishes to have me sent from Hogwarts. Perhaps he set this entire scene up, knowing that I would naturally be concerned and attempt to have him brought to justice, where he could then implicate me instead."  
  
Dumbledore frowned. "Remus isn't that cunning, Severus," he said in a tone of voice that made it clear just whom he thought was. "I don't think he would bother with such a complicated plot if he wished to have you sent away. Such arrangements are more in _your _nature, Severus."

"It's only natural that Professor Dumbledore would be reluctant to believe such accusations against a friend of his," Snape told Fudge smoothly, directing another hatred filled glare at the werewolf. 

"That's what he's relying on. He knew Professor Dumbledore wouldn't want to believe anything bad of him."

Remus began to rapidly lose patience. "That's bullshit and you know it!" he yelled, feeling his face go red. "Albus, he's lying through his teeth. I did no such thing and I never would!"  
  
"Now, he's getting defensive. See how he's beginning to be worried? He knows you're on to him," Snape continued to encourage the Minister.

"I stand by my decision," Dumbledore stated flatly. "I don't believe Professor Lupin did what you've accused him of. Personally, I don't think the capability for either obsession _or_ extreme cunning is in his make up."

Remus felt slightly flattered and slightly insulted. He supposed, under the circumstances he shouldn't complain.

He said, "I don't know everything I'm supposed to have done, but I assure you, I'm not obsessed, and I'm not scheming to get rid of Severus."

Fudge drew himself up to his entire height, which wasn't very impressive, and said loudly, "You told Professor McGonagall that you 'loved' her. She rejected you. You became insulted and decided to get her back. After you wrote this note demonstrating your feelings, taking such care with the lettering, you sent her a black rose with a note attached. The note contained the picture of a heart with a knife through it and a wolf's head on the handle. Today you sent her a bunch of red roses wrapped in black paper. I can only surmise that the first rose and the picture were intended as a warning for her if she didn't accept you. The red roses were a final effort to win her over before you did I don't know what."

He finished smugly, drawing in a great breath and staring defiantly at Remus. Something about his bearing made Remus want to slap him.

"I did what!? Professor Dumbledore, the man's mad!"  
"Someone is," Snape said slyly, staring at Remus.

He glared back. "That someone is you, Severus! Sent her roses indeed! I haven't sent Minerva any flowers at all! And what's this about a drawing? What was it again?"  
  
"A heart, stabbed with a knife that bore a wolf's head on the handle," Snape gloated. "Minerva told me all about it in Hogsmeade."

"He's lying," came a new, clear voice.

It was Minerva McGonagall.


	12. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Twelve

****

NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 12

Author: Catherine E. Grant

**__**

Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

****

Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

****

Romance: Yes. Plenty of romance, several different pairings. But will everyone get what they want? Is Minerva & Remus' friendship severed forever? Is there any hope of a reconciliation? Why is Snape so bitter?

****

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are. Simona Sinistra's first name is mine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They all turned to stare at her.   
  
Snape was the first to comment. "Lying? Minerva, you were very detailed with your description. We were in the florists and I made the comment that you should like being given flowers, and you replied that you had recently been given a black rose with a drawing attached, and that the drawing was that of a heart stabbed with a wolf's head knife."

"No, I didn't," she replied, and she was grinning. "I only told you that there was a heart, pierced with a knife. I said nothing about a wolf's head on the hilt. Albus, Minister Fudge, you can examine me under Veritaserum or a pensieve, if you wish. I did not tell Severus anything about the decoration on the hilt of the knife, and I burnt the note as soon as I received it. Therefore, the only way he could have known about it was if _he drew the picture._"  
  
"I did not!" Snape yelped. "He told me about it! Lupin was gloating and he told me about the picture!"

Dumbledore frowned. To Remus' gratification, Fudge was starting to look a little dubious.

Minerva scoffed. "Oh, and I guess he sent me the red roses too?"  
"Yes!" snapped Snape.

She raised an eyebrow. "That's strange. Simona, Julie…" She stepped aside, and Simona Sinistra slipped into the room, a slight brunette behind her.

It was the girl from the florist shop.

"Well?" Minerva prompted. The brunette nodded. "That's him. I couldn't forget his hooked nose anywhere! He came in with you to the shop in Hogsmeade yesterday, and he was in a few days before that, asking about black roses. I said we didn't have any, so he took a white one and said he had a potion that could change it. And the second time, after you left, he bought a bunch of red roses."  
  
"How many?" Dumbledore asked quietly.

  
"Thirteen. That's easy 'cos we don't get much call for that number. People like to think it jinxes a relationship."

"Why you little…" Snape burst out, starting forward. "I should have given you more galleons to keep your lying mouth shut!"

The girl shrugged. "But you didn't," she pointed out.

Minerva nodded. "I wish now I'd kept the drawing," she said ruefully, "I'm sure we could prove that Severus drew it. I do, however, have the card from the florists."  
She took it out of her pocket. "Julie assures me she didn't write anything on it, so a simple _autoricus_ spell should ascertain that Severus wrote my name on it. Albus, if you'd like to?" Albus Dumbledore calmly accepted the card she proffered and laid it on the desk. Quietly he cast the spell, and the words "Minerva McGonagall" on the card reassembled themselves into the damning "Severus Snape".   
  
Snape swore. A strange spluttering sound came from an empty corner of the room. Professor Dumbledore looked, and then he smiled.

Carefully, he turned around and pretended that he hadn't heard a thing.

After a pause, Minerva said "I should have cast that spell in the beginning, rather than being so sure of myself and rushing off to talk to you, Remus. I'm sorry."  
He nodded. It didn't matter any more.

"Then, I got angry because I thought you were kissing Simona, and I guess I felt kind of betrayed," she continued. Remus had to blink a couple of times before her words sank in. Kissing Simona!? 

He looked at Simona. "That's-" he began.

Minerva nodded, laughed softly. "Yes, I know. Not likely to happen soon. Not that it was very easy for Simona to explain that to me."  
"I had to put a full body bind on her and a gag," the other witch said, grinning.

Dumbledore stifled a quiet laugh. "I thought you knew about Simona and Poppy, Minerva," he said gently. "They've been together for nearly three years."  
McGonagall looked rueful and somewhat embarrassed. "I've never been any good at noticing what's right under my nose," she admitted. 

Simona defended her. "We try to be subtle. Hardly anyone actually knows about our relationship. When something goes wrong, that means there aren't that many people either of us can go to and talk about things with. Usually, Poppy goes to Argus and I go to Remus. That's why I was in Remus' office when you found us."  
"Leaking tears all over my good robes," Remus added, jokingly. She mock glared.

Severus Snape stared at her with a mixture of surprise, horror and disgust. "_You_ and Poppy?" he managed finally. "That's… that's disgusting, Simona." The Potions professor looked nearly as green as McGonagall's robes.

"Get used to it, dungeon boy," the fiery redhead snapped. "Or do you want me to do an obliviate charm on you so your nice, _proper_ memory isn't upset?"

Snape visibly quailed. With the mood she was in, Simona would probably erase _all_ of his memory and claim it was an accident.   
"Ah, no thank you," he stammered quickly, "I believe I can manage."  
"You'd better," she said darkly.

"Moving right along…" interrupted Minerva hurriedly. 

"Simona made me realise that Remus couldn't have sent the flowers because he was with her. We started wondering just who _did _send them. I thought Remus still could have bought them the day before, at Hogsmeade, but that was full moon, wasn't it?"  
  
Remus nodded. Simona continued, "So, Minerva pulled out the note and I cast an autoricus spell on it. Then we paid a visit to the florist and spoke with Julie, who remembered Severus and gave an – ah – very detailed description of him."

"I don't think there's any doubt as to who sent me the flowers and the notes, is there?" Minerva said quietly.

"No," Dumbledore replied gravely. "I don't believe there is. Cornelius?"  
The Minister, who so often resembled a balloon, now looked like someone had stuck a pin in him. "No, Albus," he muttered quietly. Dumbledore lay a consoling hand on his shoulder. "No need to feel embarrassed," he told him. "I think if Madame Pomfrey examined you she'd find that a _credulious_ spell has been cast on you in the last twenty four hours."

"Isn't that illegal?" asked Minerva. The Headmaster shook his head. "No, but it should be. Having any form of magical control over another person should be illegal. Technically speaking, it's not a spell _of_ control, but it gave anything Severus said absolute credibility in Cornelius' eyes."

Snape had been standing silently, if angrily, but at this he starting snarling. "Why would I want to curse that stupid, brainless git?" he yelled. "He'd believe anything _anyone_ told him if they said it forcefully enough. I didn't _need_ to put a spell on him!"  
  
Minerva commented, "I think if we check we'll find that someone did, though, won't we? Won't that be interesting, Severus?"

He glared at her. "Don't believe their lies, Minerva. They're just making all this up because they want to deceive you. _Don't listen to them!_ Come away with me, now, and you'll never be lied to again in your life, I promise."

She looked at him sadly. "The only one who's been lying to me is you, Severus. You tried to make me believe that Remus wanted to hurt me, and you pretended you knew nothing about the flowers and the drawing even though it was you all along."

"Don't you see? I had to make you see. I thought that if I showed you what sort of a person he was, you'd hate him and you'd be upset because you'd lost a friend and you'd have to turn to me! 

"When you stopped speaking to him after that night in the common room, I thought I had my chance."

"I only stopped speaking to Remus because I thought he was angry with me, from what I said to him. I didn't think he wanted to talk to me; after all he was avoiding me."  
Remus interrupted. "I wanted to give you some space. I thought you believed me a fool."  
She replied, "I thought you hated me. I made a real spectacle of myself, I'm afraid, and I thought what I said hurt you."  
He nodded slowly. "It did, but that doesn't matter now. You really aren't mad at me?"   
She shook her head. 

Remus smiled, an incredibly gentle, tender expression on his face. Silently, he walked across to Minerva and hugged her. She returned his embrace without comment. "So we can be friends again?" she said softly. Remus grinned, and smoothed her hair with a light touch. "I was hoping we could be more," he admitted, and waited when he felt Minerva stiffen against him. Almost shyly, diffidently, she looked up at him. "You actually want to?" she asked. "With _me_?"

"Would you be mad at me if I said I'm going to keep hoping that one day you'll want to?"  
"No, I don't think I would be," she replied slowly, smiling.

"Then I'm saying it."  
"You _are_?" Remus knew he wasn't mistaking the hope in her voice, and he felt grateful for getting this second chance. He could have missed it, missed _her_, all to easily. 

He cleared his throat, and a slight smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "Well, I'm afraid we can't manage the tower, the squid _or _the Hogwarts Express, but I guess we can take the proposal from Snape as a given…"

  
A look of confusion crossed Minerva's face but rapidly cleared. She laughed. "Well, I don't really feel like waiting around for the other things, so let's just forget I said that, all right?"  
"All right." Remus' eyes danced as he made his reply. Slowly he leant towards her, drawing her closer to him. She snuggled close in response, and tilted her face towards him as their lips met.

A rough, choking sobbing sound came from Snape's throat. The eyes he scowled at Minerva with were cold, but there was a glistening hint of moisture there. "You can't still want him," he said, and there could have been hysteria in his voice.

"I'm sorry, Severus."  
  
Three little words. Three little words that undermined his entire life. Snape slumped down the wall, seemingly defeated. "No," he whispered.

"I'd be there for you, I'd care for you, I'd give you all the presents and flowers you could ever want. Not like wolf boy here. He's never even given you one flower, and he professes to love you. What about cards? Has he ever given you a valentine? I'd fill your room with valentines. Has he ever bought you presents? I'd buy you the most expensive presents I could find."  
  
There were tears in Minerva's eyes. "Yes," she said finally, "but would you love me?"  
Snape looked hopelessly up at her. Something of defiance, of anger, lingered about him still, though his posture was one of defeat as he drew his wand.

__

"Avadra Kedavra."  



	13. Never Been Kissed: Chapter Thirteen. Ep...

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NEVER BEEN KISSED Ch. 13 - Epilogue

Author: [_Catherine E. Grant_][1]

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Author's note: For the purposes of this story, Minerva is five years older than Remus. Yes, I know that doesn't fit in with the novels, but this is MY story and they can be as old (or as young) as I want them to be! So there. I don't particularly like part one of this, so I'm going to try and improve it as I go along. For those of you who were wondering, this started as a challenge from a friend who wanted me to do something with McGonagall & Lupin up a tree. She's somewhat disappointed with me now. 

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Timeline: Takes place in Harry & company's sixth year. Lupin has been invited back on the proviso that he drink the Wolfsbane potion because they can't find another good DADA professor and because Dumbledore wants him there to look out for Harry.

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Romance: This is the epilogue! There aren't any couples here that weren't already evident.

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Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine unless I expressly state that they are.

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They buried him in Hogsmeade, a nice simple ceremony. All the surviving teachers attended, as did a handful of students. Professors Minerva McGonagall and Remus Lupin were conspicuous by holding hands, even when the shutter of Rita Skeeter's camera clicked down. 

Dumbledore remained inscrutable, and all he would say about Snape's death was that he died fighting a greater evil. The evil was left up to the mind of the listener, and it was no fault of Dumbledore's if most of his listeners assumed it was Lord Voldemort. And if someone might have let it slip that he died under an Unforgivable, well, no one admitted that he'd cast it on himself.

Minerva stood quietly by the head of Snape's coffin as it was lowered into the ground. "Want to talk?" Remus asked her quietly. She shrugged. "Yes. No. I don't know. Somehow I still feel guilty."  
"Careful," he warned, looking at the people around them.

She lowered her voice. "It's my fault he died, because if he hadn't been in love with me…"  
"You never knew," he soothed her gently.

"It doesn't matter." She shook her head. 

"Hey," Hermione Granger greeted them. Both professors smiled at the sight of the eager student. Though it was a funeral, and everyone not unhappy at least tried to assume an air of mourning, Hermione was bursting with energy. "I guess you worked out what was wrong," she said warmly. "No hard feelings anywhere? Everything resolved nicely? Can I come to the wedding?"  
"Yes, thank you, of course you can," Remus answered for both of them, before turning to Minerva. "Just how much did you tell her, Min?"   
She grinned. "I told her everything about me hurting you and feeling guilty, and you thinking that I hated you." He accepted her unspoken warning. 

Hermione smiled. "Yes, and you intimated that you thought something else was bothering Professor Lupin. I worked out the bits about Snape manipulating you and sending the flowers and the notes and all that by myself."  
  
Minerva nearly choked and exchanged a horrified look with Remus. "What the-" she spluttered helplessly. Remus gently put an arm around her.

"Hermione, how the…when… I'm not sure I quite want to know," he said.

The girl rolled her eyes, shook out her bushy hair. "Really, Professor," she scoffed. "What do you think Harry has an invisibility cloak for anyways?"

In the silence that followed, she added, "I told you I'd find out what was happening. And I did, didn't I?"   
  
They could only nod. 

On the other side of the coffin, Dumbledore smiled, and shook his head. Some day, maybe, they'd all learn that it was harder to keep things from him than they thought. 

He knew, for instance, about the delivery of roses to Minerva's bedroom. But he wouldn't say a word, as usual.

   [1]: mailto:avatar_31@angelfire.com



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